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Archive for the ‘Life experiences’ Category

Failure Is Not Final

Courtesy: tumblr.com

Courtesy: tumblr.com

Some events are more than just experiences for us, they are life lessons for us. Something recently happened to me in my school which taught me that it is not necessary that what you expect is always going to happen and your opinion about yourself may be not similar to that of others. What it also taught me was that when you fall, you feel miserable and depressive and you often tend to take some momentary decisions which you may regret in the long run. It’s better to get up, dust off the dirt and move on with what life brings along.

The event that I am going to describe to you may be very small and petty for you but it actually meant a lot to me at this point of time. So just bear with my rant.

Our school annually selects its School Executive Council and Prefectorial Board. I was a part of the board with the post of House Representative and I had put in all my efforts to justify me being there. Honestly, I think I had outshone my duty profile and this year I was expecting to become the Literary Captain of my house.

I had applied for the Literary Captain and I passed the Speech Round and then I had an interview with the Principal of our school. It all went quite good and I expected to get this post. I was really anticipating the results.

In a few days, the results were out but I did not get the post!

I was broken and completely shattered. I did get a post lower than what I had applied for but it was not what I desired. The whole day I had been crying in the school and everyone came to calm me. I felt betrayed. All the work I had done for my house felt like null. I felt like a loser. I momentarily took the decision of resigning from the post I was given but I decided to wait for the next day.

I came back home and cried and cried! I know it is a petty issue and that it would have no long term effect in my life but for me right now it was my life. But then I calmed myself and started talking to myself (which is the only way I find peace in such situations).

“What is wrong with you, Upasna? Shut the hell up and stop crying! This is so stupid of you!”

“But I wanted to be the Literary Captain !”(weep, sob, weep)

“It is not necessary that everyone will feel that you deserved that post, okay? Be strong! And remember, this is not the end of the world. there is always a next time”.

” Yes! I know! But I will resign from the post”

“No way, you are not doing anything like that. Justify your post and make them realize that you could have taken the responsibility of the Literary Captain also effortlessly.”

“Yes! I will not resign”

And I did not resign. I am the Prefect of my house and I will justify myself with my actions and not my words. I will rather consider this a success than a failure because anyhow I am a part of the guild and many people have believed and trusted me. I promise I will work exceptionally hards so that the next year I get a way better post.


Shaking Things Up..!!

Change. Though a heavy word, but it is one of the most vital one and we don’t even get to know when it happens. It can have various interpretations like change in people with due course of time or the change we want to see in the people around us or some intentional changes in ourselves for our good.

My Final examinations have just concluded and I have 10 days of holidays before the new session commences and I have decided to dedicate these holidays to myself. Exams are really tiring and I really feel I had extended my limits this time. I have planned of various changes in my monotonous life which will definitely make it more fun.

“There is nothing permanent in life except change,” said philosopher Heraclitus. Others have called change or variety as ‘the spice of life’.

Changes in the daily pattern of life make it difficult to roll with the punches but some of them are really inevitable.

At the instant, I genuinely needed to devote some time for my personality development which requires me to read novels, write blogs and be more systematic in my daily working.

We hear talks pertaining ‘Change’ which have an extended range.

Changes that take place in nature we have little or no control over. We cannot, for instance, switch the time of tides, which anyway, wait for no one. The other kind of change is the one we witness either in political, social or other fields including the area of personal life. These are changes over which one can exercise some degree of control, changes which can be guided by oneself or others.

As far as our human and particularly Indian society is concerned, there are so many things that fall in the second category and need change, be it in caste system, condition of the poor, status of women, dowry system, spreading corruption, and so on. Not that anyone likes these things to continue. Often the dilemma is, ‘where to begin’?

Some how I feel the basic meaning of change is the most essential and should be used by us while these broader aspects are essentially the impacts of these small changes.

So to bring the curtain down for this extensive topic, I would say that changes are always for our good and those who resist it make very slow progress. The group of people who deny change are afraid of the after effects and not ready to except the challenges of life. It cannot be denied that change can cost a lot but it is also undeniable that it also brings prosperity if decisions are taken properly.


My Date With Nature.!!

I have been quite tied up with my studies as Exams are round the corner. But yesterday I pushed myself and reluctantly decided to go to the park for a walk after my parents forced.

As I was walking past the road, my mind was thinking of all the algebraic expressions and chemical formulas and was strained with the burden of studies. I knew that my parents had sent me because they wanted me to relax and calm down a bit but every tick of the clock reminded me that I am wasting my time and that I am supposed to study.

Finally, I reached the park and then took a few rounds around. The weather was pleasant with a light breeze blowing. The soft sound of rustling of the trees and the chirp of birds disrupted my chain of thoughts. I was tired and I sat down on a bench. For the first 10 minutes, I was restless. Then I seemed to settle down a bit and was calmer now.

I observed the tall standing trees and the lush green grass ornated by vibrant flowers. I observed the honey bees sucking nectar from the flowers. Everything seemed so effortlessly beautiful. Everything in nature is always moving, always working. Even when animals and plants are in dormant phases, this rest is a kind of active measure for conserving energy. There is no hurry in nature yet it accomplishes all it tasks.

While I observed the trees, they said to me that patience is essential and while I observed the grass, it made me appreciate persistence. There was one old tree which has been there even before I was born. It has grown stronger by time which makes me think struggle isn’t a bad thing; it’s the foundation of vitality.

The lessons I received from the nature didn’t seem to end.

Grass portrays humility, as countless pairs of feet walk all over it every day.  It doesn’t complain or wither away.  In fact it usually springs back up, unharmed each time. How wonderful is it to walk barefoot on soft green grass? This is something that can be very healing to do and ‘earths’ you – giving you a feeling of replenishment and grounding in your being. Try it, and contemplate the humility of the grass.

A tree embodies the quality of self-offering.  It provides homes and shelter for animals, birds and insects, as well as offering shade and fruit to us humans. The Buddha sat beneath the great bodhi tree and reached his state of enlightenment there. Next time you walk through a park, breathe in the beauty of the trees and perhaps offer a moment of gratitude to them for teaching us the divine art of self-offering.

Each element said something.

My phone rang. It was mom. I got so lost in the beauty of nature that time had seemed to fly away. I went back home with a smile and a glowing calm on my face.

This experience had been very enriching and I think I’ll be doing this quite often now. Try it yourself once.

Mom = Master Of Multitasking.!!

Weekly Writing Challenge : Leave Your Shoes At The Door

Pick a stranger, family member, or friend. Imagine a day in their life. Give us insight. Give us detail. Don’t just tell us about the other perspective, make us forget that you don’t live it every day.

“A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.blog16_mother_word_cloud

My mom is someone whom I have always looked up to. She can multitask with ease and so, in ths post I’ll step into my mom’s shoes and give you guys an account of my mom’s day.

The alarm clock rings.

Oh.! It’s 6:30 am already. A bad start for a long day. I jump out of my bed for the day’s battle. After getting ready, I prepare the lunchbox for my lazy daughter who is very stubborn and is not getting out of the bed. She’ll surely miss the bus today.

“Upasna, get up..!!! It’s 7:15 am. Get up or you’ll miss your bus. Dad’s not going to drop you school as he has already left for some conference.” Finally, this lazy lad gets up and gets ready for the school.

I drop her at the bus stop and leave for work. I am a teacher. I drive my way to school but unfortunately, today I find traffic early morning. Then, I reach my workplace – School. I rush to my class where, as expected, those tiny tots had turned the class topsy – turvy. I just hope that my co-coordinator must not have seen this.

As I enter the class. in a synchronized and melodic way, they say “Good Morning ma’am”. I wish them Good Morning and ask them to settle down. I love teaching and that’s the reason I was driven towards it even though I had other options.

Now, it was the Lunch break. I am supposed to be in the class till everyone finishes their lunch and then I go to the staff room to meet my fellow teachers and have lunch. Vijaya ma’am has brought Idli-  Sambhar. It tastes great. I’ll try making it at home for Upasna and I am sure she’ll like it as she always complains for cooking something new for her.

Then, we had the usual gossip session pertaining an array of topics starting from husbands and ending with the latest fashion trends. The recess is over. Back to the class, I rush. The rhythmic greetings welcomed me and then we did a bit of study.

At 2:15 pm , the school got over and I had dispersed all the students. Now, I was heading back home. Upasna would be back home by 3:00 pm and my maid would be waiting outside the house. I need to rush.

I reach home and my maid was waiting outside so, I called her in to finish her work. Then Upasna came back home. She looked very tired. I immediately prepared food for her and she had it just after changing her clothes.bigstock-Woman-Multi-Tasking-14892320

Now, this is the time I get to relax and do some leisure work like Social Networking. Upasna is at her study table with her books and all other work is finished. I have a short nap and then back to work at 6:00 pm. I prepare dinner and then I complete the schoolwork.

Then,we all sit together and have dinner and this is the only time we get to talk to each other. We sit and and share the day’s happenings with each other and finally, we go to sleep.

Now, when I think of it, I really feel that whenever I trouble my mom, I give her even more stress. I love you mom and thanks for everything.

How are you.?? Fine.??!!

Self realisation

“Often, it’s not about becoming a new person, but becoming the person you were meant to be, and already are, but don’t know how to be.” ― Heath L. Buckmaster, Box of Hair: A Fairy Tale

I just passed this quote promoting self realization and it made me think what does actually mean knowing yourself. Does its meaning only confine to knowing your strengths and weaknesses or does it have some deeper meaning to? This question troubled me for 2 days. I realized it didn’t mean just your positives and negatives, it can also be regarded as the current state of mind. In the fast paced life of ours, we neglect the importance of knowing our actual state of mind and assume it to be the ideal , calm and peaceful state.

Realization of what ails you is half the battle won; the rest is all about maintaining a firm control on life and balance within.

Sometimes you do not realize you are in the midst of a vast silence till it is pierced through with sound. Often, you may not notice noise until it ends abruptly and silence prevails. You may not notice how dark it is till a light is flicked on. Sometimes you do not know how agitated you have been, till a caressing hand calms you. The absence of some people makes you realize the significance of their presence.

We need to realize these small indications at the right times. Ignorance may lead to you being an ‘unaware’ person. Sometimes it might be that you are undergoing depression but you don’t know about it because you are trying to suppress or ignore it. I say – Let it out. Pretending to be happy and prosperous cannot go very far.

Sometimes you don’t know there’s a gaping hole in your soul till someone or something comes along to fill it and lift you to euphoric heights. This hole can also be compared to as the lost piece of the jigsaw puzzle without which you feel incomplete.

This hole is a feeling of inadequacy, of something vital missing from life. Very often a realization of this gap causes a great restlessness till we figure out how to mend it. And yes, different things work for different people. All holes are not the same size and dimension, and each needs a different solution to fix it. Each of us has our own compulsions, our dreams, our purpose and goals; some things that make us wildly happy.

But the first step, of course, is the realization of the void before we set out to bridge it. The realization may not always come in a peaceful, friendly manner. It could be a jolt of awareness, a bolt from the blue. A jolt is often what you need to shake you out of a complacent, somnambulant state. And so, sometimes if someone or something comes along to shake us up, it is important to understand that Nature, God or your own supreme consciousness wants you disturbed for some good reason. So, we need to realize it, accept it and fix it.

Living in the World Of Fantasy..!!

Some days ago, we were having a conversation in the school that what is better – to live in the world of fantasy or to live in reality. I was no different from my fellow mates and I wished to animate myself in my sweet and cozy world of fantasy where everything was just perfect ( just like me ).

My world of fantasy reformed all the defects in the society around me. It actually helps me to sort of idealize how my surroundings and its air should be.Fantasy may not always mean living with fairies, elves and spirits and imagining yourself as Alice in the Wonderland. If you admire a person and deeply love him, you fantasize that person spending his quality time with you and your world of fantasy will only limit to that person.

Some fantasize what they wish to become in future and what and how they will take their life further with time. This aids us to create strategies to acquire the goal.

But living in fantasy somewhat takes away the time of your present and makes realization of things slow. Just imagine, you are in front of your Boss and you can’t resist fantasizing yourself with Angelina Jolie whom you saw yesterday in ‘Salt’ and suddenly Boss asks you a question about the monthly sales and profit. You are like, “Yes Boss, Were you saying something?” and the Boss turns red with anger.  The next day you get a notice that your promotion is cancelled and you are like ,”Damn it. I hate you Angelina”.

I’ve been blessed to always find ways out of the busyness of the world. For the past two weekends I’ve had the wonderful opportunity to spend it out of town with family. I got to leave all the stress of work, school, and every other minute problem back in the town I come from. When you escape, you learn to live in a place of fantasy as opposed to reality.

You find that you get to live a life of imagination and liveliness that is only tangible when you don’t have other things to think of. The hardest part is coming back to the reality that you first escaped from. It isn’t normal to live in a fantasy world, it isn’t healthy either. Reality strikes when we don’t want it too, the earth seems like it’s suffocating our lives, and we feel like there is too much to do.

I feel and what we concluded from the discussion in the school was that we need to counterbalance fantasy and realism. Never stop fantasizing because it actually helps to enhance your creativity. But learn to take control over your mind when it starts wandering in the fantasy world and to bring it back into reality.  🙂


Criticism… is good!

Sometimes small experiences and daily happening teach you lot. I was selected by my teachers to participate in an inter-school competition which was about model making on architectural styles of different countries. I had put all pains to make the model as good as possible and took every effort to develop it and make it eligible to win that competition. Our group was of 3 students and coincidentally we were all friends and we skipped classes and and made the model.

One day before the competition we had to present our model to the Principal of our school. We were very nervous about what will be ma’am‘s remarks on the model. Honestly, ma’am did not like the model at all and pointed all several defects in the model. Each time she criticized the model our hearts and hopes went low. She was not happy with the model and as we walked out of her room we were disheartened, angry and felt hopeless. We didn’t feel like going to the competition the next day. It was a big blow to us and we felt that all our hard work was useless.

But then I realized that getting disheartened is no option and I mustered up some hope and told my friends to work upon the defects. We took the model back home and make necessary amendments. Though the hopes were very low, I believed that we still need to try our best.

Now, the day came. the competition day..!! We decided to go and give our best and most importantly enjoy. The models made by other schools were far more creative but we kept hope. The results were surprising, we backed the third prize and there was no limit to our happiness. I thanked God and somewhere down I thanked our Principal because her criticism helped us work harder.

It made me think that if we take criticism the positive way this criticism may become the major reasons for your success.I don’t really enjoy receiving criticism. In fact, for me, it’s one of the least enjoyable parts of leadership. I particularly cringe when my family members hear or read about criticisms of me. It hurts them and so it hurts me even more.

But, if I am truly honest with myself, I have to admit I’m a better person and leader because of the criticism I have received. And while I certainly don’t agree with all of my critics all of the time, I have learned from many of them. And my critics include all my sources of inspiration and my well wishers. Many times when I receive criticism, I am receiving healthy correction. Sure there are some critics whose words are malicious and unfounded. But that does not mean I should reject the critics altogether. And even when I feel like I have been wronged, I should not assume that I can’t learn something from the critic’s words.